> Finally, I never would have put the strings "PHP" and "sexiness" in a sentence together (though I guess I just did).

A simple Google search shows how very wrong you are:

"sexy php" - 56,100,000 results
"sexy asp" - 8,380,000
"sexy java" - 6,360,000
"sexy ruby" - 2,840,000
"sexy perl" - 532,000
"sexy C++" - 488,000
"sexy smalltalk" - 113,000
"sexy fortran" - 107,000
"sexy COBOL" - 58,100

There are also very high results for "sexy logo." Perhaps, since I was
in fourth grade, someone's figured out something interesting to do
with that stupid turtle!

Tim